The speaker that survived the stigma

By all standards, I had no right to come close to ending my life - nonetheless even feeling depressed. I'm living in the USA, 6 feet tall, rising personal trainer, a photoshoot model, college graduate, and a honorably discharged Gulf War Marine veteran.

Business was growing exponentially, I'm a father to three baby girls, was happily married, and it seemed like everybody wanted my attention.

Yet when the 2008 recession hit and I lost everything overnight, I crumbled and allowed the worst of myself to define me. I lost my marriage, the respect of my daughters, the admiration of everyone who used to put me on a pedestal.

My business went backwards so fast that I had to file for bankruptcy. Everything I worked hard to avoid has now happened and sure enough, I took them as my identity.

Like anyone who does not know how to navigate personal crises, I started to victimize myself and forgot the values that built my success. The truth was, I did not want to start my business over, start another relationship when I felt like baggage, re-earn the respect of my daughters and most importantly: re-earn my own respect.

It was when I started winning for me that I started to slowly recognize what is my responsibility and what needs to change. Some actions that shifted my trajectory were reestablishing my business foundation and apologizing to people I hurt during my depression - while accepting any reaction they gave me.

Gathering the courage to get help and acknowledging my downfall was a shaking blow but the results are worth it.
Now I am a better husband to my wife, earned the respect of my daughters, and surrounded by friends who actually wants to be with me.